Social Media and Divorce


Social media can be fun and informative. Divorcing in the social media age – not so much. Social media and divorce can be a bad combination.

Social Media and Divorce

Being active on social media makes this difficult time much harder. If you are considering a divorce, or going though the process, it can feel good to share with people online. It might be tempting to share too much, however. Worse, it can be hard to know how much is too much.

There have been cases where posts made online were problematic for the legal case. A friend posted pictures of a divorcing mother dancing on a bar. There was a dad who claimed he didn’t have money for child support, and yet posted about his new SCUBA gear. Then there are the parents who post nasty rumors about their co-parent. What happens in cyberspace…stays there for everyone to see and (mis)interpret.

Do yourself a favor and don’t post things that may get you in trouble. You may want to consider staying away from social media altogether.

Interested in learning more about the problems social media and divorce can create? Email me: Keith@AttorneyGrossman.com or contact me online, call my toll free number: 877-687-1392, or call my local number: 239-210-7516.

To learn more about emotions during a divorce, you can read my free e-book, Does Every Divorce Need a Shark?

Does Every Divorce Need a Shark

 


When To Get A Divorce? Older Adults Are Answering the Question


Older adults are answering the question when to get a divorce. According to a recent study, twice as many people over 50 are getting divorced than they did 20 years ago.

When to Get a Divorce

There may be many reasons for this shift; greater financial independence for women, a societal focus on individual happiness and decreased stigma surrounding divorce are all examples. With people expecting to live longer than ever before, the prospect of spending 30 or so more years with this person can be a make-or-break proposition.

It doesn’t have to be the breaking point. However, if, after the kids are grown, a couple finds they really have nothing in common, it’s time for some soul searching. Likewise, if one partner is committed to making it work and the other has made up his or her mind to dissolve the marriage, it might be time to take stock in the future. After a long emotional investment in a relationship, the specter of divorce can be especially difficult, even for the one who wants out. Even if both parties agree to divorce, it doesn’t mean it will be easy.

The unknown can be scary, too. Who will live where? How will we split up the assets? What will it be like to be alone after all this time? Is there still a chance to enjoy a fulfilling relationship with someone, somewhere down the line? If there are children from the marriage, their status as adults doesn’t mean they won’t be devastated, too, at least for a time.

The best-case scenario for all involved is to take time to communicate to the best of your ability, hire a mediator or attorney, gather all the relevant paperwork and consult with a trusted professional about the state of your financial affairs, take it slow and take care of yourself. Take advantage of the resources offered by a support group, a counselor or the listening ear of a close friend.

Do you have questions that need answers and feel it is time to speak with an attorney? Email me: Keith@AttorneyGrossman.com, or call toll free: 877-687-1392, or locally: 239-210-7516.

Are you in touch with the role emotions can play in a divorce? Download my free e-book: Does Every Divorce Need a Shark? It reviews your options and can help you organize your thoughts as to when to get a divorce.

Does Every Divorce Need a Shark

email me: Keith@AttorneyGrossman.com, or call toll free: 877-687-1392, or locally: 239-210-7516.


Effects of Divorce on Children When They Are Used as Messengers


It’s hard for kids to be kids these days. We’re grooming them to be ready for school at earlier and earlier ages. The volume of homework has increased exponentially and some school districts have done away with recess.

Effects of Divorce on Children

Divorce adds yet another layer of difficulty to letting kids have time to play and just be kids. The effects of divorce on children when they are used as messengers makes matters worse. Some parents involve the kids in the parenting logistics. It will be significantly better for your children if you are divorcing without using your children as messengers.

It can be tempting to have your child send a message to the other parent. Whether it’s as simple as “Mom said it’s your turn to provide snacks for the Girl Scout meeting,” or as loaded as “Dad said you’d better not be late dropping me off at her house…again,” tasking a child with being the go-between does damage in a few ways. It places too much responsibility on the child. It sets an example of adults avoiding responsibility. It also results in further breakdown of communication between parents.

Adults often have strong emotional motivation for avoiding their former spouses, and perhaps valid reasons for doing so. But divorced parents must consider their children’s developmental needs first and be the adult so the child doesn’t have to.

Would you like to review how to keep your children from being the messengers when divorcing? Email Keith@AttorneyGrossman.com, or call toll free: 877-687-1392, or locally: 239-210-7516.

Want to learn more about a Parenting Plan? Download my free e-book: Does Every Divorce Need a Shark?

Does Every Divorce Need a Shark

Do you need help in shaping your future? Email Keith@AttorneyGrossman.com, or call toll free: 877-687-1392, or locally: 239-210-7516.

Interested in learning more about dealing with divorce? Download my free e-book: Does Every Divorce Need a Shark?

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Honoring Your Priorities When Going Through A Divorce


A recent study by Brown University suggests getting a divorce may be contagious. Tracking thousands of residents of a Massachusetts city over the course of three decades, the researchers discovered that when a friend or relative is going through a divorce, married couples within the same network become dramatically more likely to divorce, too.

Going Through a Divorce

“The contagion of divorce can spread through a social network like a rumor, affecting friends up to two degrees removed,” said Rose McDermott, who led the research team.

Elsewhere in this blog, we established that the only voice that matters when getting a divorce is your own. In the emotional whirlwind that accompanies many divorces, it can be difficult to prioritize and turn down the volume on people offering unsolicited advice. The Brown social contagion findings are certainly suggestive, and this kind of outside influence is important to identify while exploring how to determine your and your family’s future. It’s not recommended to become isolated while you sort things out, but be aware of the “static,” and learn how to tune it out so you can honor your own priorities. A trusted counselor or attorney can help identify your options and determine which ones make the most sense in shaping your future.

Do you need help in shaping your future? Email Keith@AttorneyGrossman.com, or call toll free: 877-687-1392, or locally: 239-210-7516.

Interested in learning more about dealing with divorce? Download my free e-book: Does Every Divorce Need a Shark?

Does Every Divorce Need a Shark